How to Say No to Unmanageable Workloads

Dear H.S.,

This is a very challenging topic. In the coaching I do, I would say time management and organization are always in the top three obstacles my clients mention. Although I know all of the strategies and have seen change happen when people shift their approach, I also know we sometimes get to a place where conditions make it very difficult for us to be focused and able to manage effectively. You are down three people. That means there are three full-time jobs that are not getting done right now around you. That said, the questions those jobs could answer need to go somewhere, and that’s to you. It’s unfortunate, but firms often will drag their feet intentionally or unintentionally to fill positions. This could be financial; it could be a matter of not finding the right candidate; it could be a poor decision-making process to finalize a hire; and so on. The people who are left will be expected to fill the hole, and sometimes this means covering a lot more bases than you are being paid to cover!

I kicked off 2025 with my mother, who lives close by, very sick with pneumonia. I was spending six hours a day (three in the morning, three at night) as her primary caretaker. I had my youngest home from college and one of our business partners recovering from some major surgery. My days were literally packed – and still are, as I dig myself out – with back-to-back meetings for every minute I was in my seat. Trying to manage time and be more organized went out the window during this 3.5-week period.

To stay sane, I kept a running list of priorities for when I could pick my head back up again and focus. I had a list of home-related activities, a list of business activities organized by topic and/or client, and a list of “if I can find the time.” I wasn’t writing a lot, just some ideas about what I would focus on first, next, etc. This helped keep me from worrying about everything that wasn’t getting done. Now that I am on the other side of the demands, I can systematically go through my lists while also attending to the day-to-day. Yes, there are a number of very packed days, with many things that had to get pushed out, but I can see progress – and that’s what keeps us going.

Each day while you are in the midst of the chaos, write down just two things you want to get accomplished that day. Chunk these things down into smaller discreet pieces so they are manageable. For example, if you need to update client records, there are a number of steps. You have to identify the clients, type out what’s needed, log into the system, do your updates, etc.

It sounds silly to talk about such small steps, but if you had something on your calendar that took 10 minutes versus something that took 90 minutes, you’d get the 10-minute piece done. This then allows you to move on to the next 10-minute increment, and the next. Accomplishing something and feeling in control is important when you feel your time is not your own and you can’t see an end point.

The second thing is to consider letting colleagues know you can’t be the go-to on everything. I realize you said you enjoy this role and you would lose something personal to you if you give this up, but you can’t do everything. You cannot do everything. You just can’t. I should say this 100 times.

No one person can work until 9 or 10 p.m. at night, keep their family happy and cover all of what needs to be covered. It isn’t possible, and you are seeing ramifications from your family. You have to let your colleagues know things need to change. Brainstorm with them about how the unit together could cover for the three missing colleagues. Or put together a presentation for your management that shows the need for immediate hires.

This brings me to the third idea, one that no one likes to do but is super powerful – time tracking. For the next two to three weeks, capture what you are doing in 15 minute increments throughout the day. Don’t judge anything, just write it down on an Excel spreadsheet, a Word document, or in a notebook. You don’t have to write too much, just a notation about what you are doing.

I have a coaching client who just completed this and was very interested to see the results. At the end of the time, I asked him to review and put red next to things he really ought not to be doing, yellow next to those with a question mark and green for those that are important and definitely the right areas of focus. He identified about three half-days he was spending in internal meetings. These are often yellow – sometimes you have no choice but to attend, but sometimes you could politely opt-out if other things are pressing. There is often a lot of red, the things you should not be doing and aren’t paid to do. Without three other people in the seats around you, you aren’t going to find Nirvana anytime soon, but at least this exercise could keep you focused on more opportunities to say “no!” to something.

There are times in life when factors conspire to make it very difficult to be as productive as we need to – and want to – be. But even in the midst of these times it’s important to feel like you have some control and do the things that will keep you on track. Control the controllable.

Dear Bev,

I work on a team where two people carry their weight more than they should. However, three people come in at 9 a.m. and leave at 4:30, having taken their hour lunch, and they never, ever ask others if they need any help. The scales are really unbalanced, and it is driving me and my colleague who also works too much crazy.

We’ve gone to our boss and she says “Work it out,” or, her favorite, “Just say no if you need to.” How do we say no to clients? To internal meetings we are required to attend? To projects with deadlines? I was very sick for all of Christmas break and my colleague has been (and remains) out for two weeks with the flu. We can’t keep this up.

Anonymous

Dear Anonymous,

It is really hard when colleagues are forced to press their peers, but I’m afraid that is your best and only option here. I don’t know how clear the roles and responsibilities are or whether your colleagues think what you are doing isn’t their job. However, you probably have to call a sit-down meeting amongst the five of you to talk about what’s on the plate and how to better divvy up the needs.

It’s very possible your colleagues will say they aren’t being paid to work more than 9-4:30 with a break (and they are probably right about this), and they won’t take on more work voluntarily. This will leave you and your colleague with a decision to make. Do you let some of the work drop or do you continue to do what you are doing? Honestly, letting the work drop, while it will pain you and you will likely get reprimanded for it, might be the only way to show your boss what’s happening.

I see this all of the time. Leadership puts team members in an impossible position to get the work done without enough people in place, or the right processes, or without team collaboration. Your boss should be stepping in here to facilitate a discussion with all of you, or she could hire someone outside to do this. In the meantime, you might have to step into a leadership role yourself and guide the discussion with your colleagues. Sorry!

Beverly Flaxington co-founded The Collaborative, a consulting firm devoted to business building for the financial services industry, in 1995. The firm also founded and manages the Advisors Sales Academy. The firm has won the Wealthbriefing WealthTech award for Best Training Solution for 2022, 2023 and 2024. Beverly is currently an adjunct professor at Suffolk University teaching undergraduate and graduate students Entrepreneurship and Leading Teams. She is a Certified Professional Behavioral Analyst (CPBA) and Certified Professional Values Analyst (CPVA).

She has spent over 25 years in the investment industry and has been featured in Selling Power Magazine and quoted in hundreds of media outlets, including The Wall Street Journal, MSNBC.com, Investment News and Solutions Magazine for the FPA. She speaks frequently at investment industry conferences and is a speaker for the CFA Institute.

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