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I’m an introvert. That epiphany came to me late in life. Until then, I just believed I was socially awkward and didn't enjoy the "good times" everyone else did. The idea of networking has always been alien to me. I didn't like large groups of people or social situations where I did not know anyone.
Despite this, I have never found it very difficult to generate business. Here’s how introverts can take what may seem like a weakness and turn it into a significant advantage.
Some definitions
An introvert is concerned primarily with internal thoughts and feelings.
An extrovert is concerned primarily with the physical and social environment.
An ambivert exhibits the traits of both extroverts and introverts.
By some estimates, introverts make up as much as half of the population. I found it comforting to learn that I am not alone.
Common traits of introverts
Introverts share an aversion to small talk. Author Diane Cameron wrote: “Introverts crave meaning, so party chitchat feels like sandpaper to our psyche.” In contrast to extroverts, introverts enjoy meaningful, substantive conversations.
Introverts tend to "zone out" in highly stimulating environments like noisy parties and large networking events. They prefer to work alone or in small groups and are able to focus intensely on long, detailed projects. An ideal assignment for an introvert would involve periods of solitary work combined with intermittent consulting with a small group of people.
It's not surprising, therefore, that I spend much of my time alone authoring books and blogs, which are then reviewed by editors. It is the perfect work environment for an introvert.
Introverts tend to be very attuned to the emotions of others. As such, they are adept at perceiving, understanding and managing emotions and feelings. This trait is described as having high "emotional intelligence."
Introverts often feel alienated. They don’t enjoy activities most people regard as “fun”, which includes most group activities. They are subjected to comments like: “Why would you want to spend Saturday evening alone?” They are frequently made to feel like social misfits who “don’t belong.”
Common misperceptions about introverts
Introverts are often perceived as shy or antisocial. These are misperceptions. Introverts don't fear negative judgment (a common cause of shyness). They just prefer to be alone or in less stimulating environments.
Introverts don't dislike people. They just want to interact with others on their own terms.
Introverts don't need to be fixed or changed in order to be more like extroverts. The World Health Organization and the American Psychiatric Association state that introversion may be a contributing factor in diagnosing certain personality disorders, but many respected authors and clinical psychologists disagree.
Nancy Ancowitz and Laurie Helgoe, summing up their view that there’s nothing wrong with introverts, asked: “Wouldn't it be fitting at this historic time for these organizations to join the healthy introversion camp by recognizing the more than 150 million Americans who, like Neil Armstrong, simply prefer to exercise their minds rather than their jaws?”
Using your strengths as an introvert to gather AUM
Don't believe the myth that extroverts are better at sales. According to Adam Grant, a Ph.D. and a professor at Wharton, the “average correlation between extraversion and sales performance was a whopping zero.”
My experience has firmly convinced me that it is easier to gather AUM as an introvert than as an extrovert.
As I noted in a prior article: "The single most important trait of a successful advisor is the ability to empathize with the feelings of prospects and clients." This ability, to genuinely identify with your prospects’ and clients’ rather than being preoccupied with your own agenda, is a key benefit of being an introvert.
Since introverts are not concerned with being the "life of the party," it’s easier for them to have a sincere interest in others. They are not inclined to interrupt. They actively listen rather than merely waiting to pounce with the next point in their presentation. Their listening skills permit them to elicit emotions and feelings. And, because introverts are analytical, they tend not to respond with pat phrases but instead think through their words.
These characteristics are extremely appealing to prospects and clients. Introverts can convey that they are hearing and understanding what their clients say and feel.
Don’t believe success as an advisor is hindered by being an introvert. If both an introvert and an extrovert were presenting to a prospect, the introvert would have the advantage.
Rejoice in your introverted personality.
Dan Solin is the director of investor advocacy for the BAM Alliance and a wealth advisor with Buckingham. He is a New York Times best-selling author of the Smartest series of books. His latest book is The Smartest Sales Book You'll Ever Read.
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